Creating a Sibling Plan for Birth: How to Prepare Your Older Child for the Big Day

Yaffa Garber Tilles
Oct 27
3 min read

Welcoming a new baby is an exciting and emotional time for the whole family- especially if you already have a little one at home. While you’re packing your hospital bag and finalizing your birth plan, don’t forget one essential piece of preparation: your Sibling Plan for Birth.

A sibling plan ensures that your older child is cared for, comforted, and included while you’re giving birth and adjusting to life with a new baby. It’s a simple but powerful way to reduce stress for everyone- parents, kids, and caregivers alike.

At Boston Birth Village, our doulas regularly help families create thoughtful, detailed sibling care plans so you can head into labor knowing your firstborn is in good hands.

1. Make a “Sibling Care Document”

Start with a written plan that gives caregivers all the information they need to step in confidently. You can type it up or print it and post it on the fridge. Include:

Pediatrician contact information
Allergies or medical needs
Favorite foods and snacks (and what to avoid)
Daytime and bedtime routines - naps, meals, stories, and comfort items
Favorite toys and activities that help your child feel calm and happy
Words or phrases unique to your child’s language (“baba” for blanket, “nigh-nigh” for bedtime, etc.)

Once your document is ready, share it with everyone who might help- doulas, teachers, friends, and family members.

2. Think Through the Logistics

In addition to your child’s daily needs, it’s helpful to map out the details that will make your sibling plan run smoothly:

Labor At Home: If you plan to experience early labor at home, what are the plans for the older child? Do you want them around, and can you practice some labor positions or sounds with them around so they aren't afraid? Trying moooooing together!
Authorized pickups: Make sure daycare or preschool has updated forms with who can pick up your child.
Car seat access: Who has one ready and knows how to use it?
Daytime coverage: Who will handle drop-off, meals, naps, and playtime if you go into labor during the day?
Nighttime coverage: Who can come over in the middle of the night or stay overnight if needed?
Short-term vs. long-term plan:
- Short term: Who cares for your child while you’re in labor or in the hospital, or until grandparents can arrive to take over childcare?
- Long term: Who can help after you return home, if recovery takes time or your partner needs to focus on the newborn?
Introductions to the new baby: What are your thoughts and expectations of the introduction? Be sure to clarify this with each other and get on the same page. Remember, you can always change your mind.

3. Ask for (and Accept) Help

Creating a sibling plan isn’t just about logistics- it’s about community. Take time to reach out and coordinate with your village:

Daycare teachers: Ask if any teachers or assistants can be on your emergency contact list.
Family and friends: Identify who can help and what their schedules look like.
Emotional support: Who can you talk to about your nerves or mixed emotions about leaving your older child while giving birth?

How a Boston Birth Village Doula Can Help

At Boston Birth Village, we understand that preparing for birth is about more than just the baby—it’s about supporting the entire family system. Our doulas can:

Help you create a detailed sibling care plan tailored to your family’s needs
Coordinate with your child’s caregivers and daycare to ensure everyone’s informed
Offer emotional reassurance to you (and your partner) as you navigate these changes
Provide postpartum doula support once you’re home, helping your older child adjust and your family settle into a new rhythm

Having a doula’s guidance through this process can turn anxiety into confidence, helping you enter labor knowing both of your children are surrounded by care and consistency.

If you’d like guidance creating your own sibling plan or want to learn more about doula support in Boston, reach out to Boston Birth Village —we’re here to help every member of your family thrive.